Appearance is Everything

Knowing that appearance is everything, Daniel already knows he looks different from everyone else, which causes him to be this silent boy who's extremely observant. 

He has this self-deprecation, seeing himself as a crumb. "Crumbs didn't want to be noticed but were as noticeable as an open sore, tucking themselves away to avoid the places of highest concentration..."(59).

That point of belittling his value and internalizing these differences between himself and other messes up his desire to not stand out and be an alien. It's sad that no matter how uninvolved some minorities are with society, they're somehow pulled into the situation and suffering from the hierarchy of influence of those that are preferred. 

Coming from someone who's also super quiet, deeply observing surroundings kind of becomes a daily thing. Daniel's very watchful from trying to blend. But at the same time, he's a little obsessed with comparing himself to what he's heard or seen.

From being tossed around from place to place and having this horrible feeling of unwantedness, he never has an actual home to return to. Home is supposed to be a safe place to feel comfortable, but for Daniel, nearly nowhere has that amount of comfort unless reunited with his mother. In every situation he knows less about his mother, he loses his trust in people because of one true destination of comfort, where he knows he'll be accepted naturally. 

At this point in his life, it's too common to not be wanted by parents. It's like he can't accept this generosity and love that his foster parents give because of their previous desires for a younger child "whom they had wanted more" (58). After reading that, I felt pretty struck by how much he can't put his trust into anyone and can't imagine himself being important. He can't get past the fact that there are people willing to help him because of his recurring lost trust in those that have broken their promises in the past.

Being at the Top

The idea of the American Dream: success will come through hard work while doing what you enjoy.

Even today, we still believe working hard leads to success. But with society, the verisimilitude of American success is based on status and physical appearance. 

Like in A Raisin in the Sun, everyone works hard to achieve what they dream of doing, but the problem society has with appearance hinders their effort. 

In a way, Beneatha's like the Gandhi of her household, advocating for her own rights and independence. Beneatha sets herself off from the rest of her family. It's like she embraces her uniqueness and has this fiery passion to do all that she can to satisfy herself. 

And take Walter, he's a chauffeur and yields to people higher in status by driving them around everywhere and treating them like gods. Even if there was a white person, being at the lowest of the low like going to the casino to gamble every day, that's preferred over someone who looks unfamiliar.  

Walter is the man of the house, assuming the role of being the breadwinner to support his family. However, there's such limited opportunity for him to earn more. That's probably why he has that dream of owning a liquor store so he's able to be the lone ranger of his business and able to act independently without needing to consult anyone since he's would be at the top. 

As humans, we just love to own everything and be the boss of others because of that feeling of being high in status. Honestly, society profiles people based on race, impeding the efforts of one to actually feel that accomplishment. 

Colorblind

I used to live just on the other side of Troy and went to a different school district. Looking back, I'm pretty sure I ended up being one of the only Asians at that school, the rest being mostly Caucasian.

Once I moved to this side of Troy, I straight up didn't realize there were so many Asians. I literally didn't know there were Koreans and other Chinese people existent in Troy. I was so uneducated about race on the other side, not even knowing what certain races were, mostly because I wasn't exposed to many types at that other school.

I was full of colorblindness when I was younger since I didn't really see race, which also could've been my naivety and ignorance as a child. I remember one kid, who loved to read everything, asking if someone was related to me simply by my last name, Lee. I can't remember what he actually did, but he just made the connection that I was related to whoever he was reading about.

Because I was one of the few, I honestly just find it interesting how that he acknowledged my race but just kind of generalized it. Lee is such a common last name, but he wouldn't have known because of his limited exposure. I honestly can't blame him for thinking that way.

Now, being submerged into a more Asian area, I became aware of race. I did change my perspective, especially since I became older, but it's like I'm mostly concerned with the community I'm included in now. Being only involved with this now dominant Asian community has probably plagued me again with colorblindness since I only know or probably even care about what goes on in my specific grouping.

In A Raisin in the Sun, Lindner was saying how African Americans should be with their own, and Americans also with their own. It's kind of similar to how I subconsciously gravitate towards those similar to me but then what happens is that I only realize what's going on in what I'm involved in, with no interest in anything else. To him, that was considered safe. Naturally, it's so much easier to not think and do the wrong things instead of doing the right thing, making life easier to go by without consciously realizing race and without making sure everything said isn't misinterpreted.

Stars

"I never noticed the stars before. I always thought of them as great big diamonds that belonged to someone. Now they frighten me." (113).

Her whole life, Kismine believed these stars were owned by someone. She didn't bat an eye to these stars because she thought they were always owned. So, it seems like she thought that since they're already such valuable jewels already owned, she has no chance of obtaining them. When in reality, it's something so precious and shining belonging to no one at all, giving everyone equal opportunity to appreciate the beauty of it. 

The moment I read this I was instantly struck with this one scene in The Glass Castle where the main character's father tells her all about the stars and asks her to pick one. She was young but smart enough to realize no one owns the stars. But according to Rex Walls..."You just have to claim them before anyone else." I thought about how they're the complete opposite of Kismine—running around in a car and escaping debt. Yet, they still attach ownership to these stars.

There's actually some website where you can "adopt stars" but it's obviously unofficial and probably a scam. 

Still random but related, I've always seen those Adopt-a-Highway signs on the road and genuinely thought you could name a highway when I was younger. It's actually just a volunteer program where you vow to "adopt"(more like choose) a side of the road to clean up for 2 years. 

It's a nice idea...but the name is quite misleading. It sounds like you could potentially own a highway, which is super satisfying, but is nowhere near that. 

All three of these random thoughts I had dealt with this connection to ownership. The idea of it is so flattering and honoring to actually own something people see everyday, but it's just another false reality. Whatever we own, we love to show off to everyone. We always think we can own everything we see or think that something is owned by someone else, but all that shows is how obsessed we are with the worth and value of something that we admire. 

Ignorance

I don't get why Daisy's child only made an appearance twice. To a mother, a child is practically her whole life. Though Daisy's "changed" through Gatsby's eyes, she's indifferent about raising her child since she doesn't actually do anything to care for her. She even wants her daughter to be "a beautiful little fool," only caring for her worth and appearance. 

Even the daughter exhibits some sort of ignorance. She is pretty young, but she doesn't hate the fact her mother isn't spending time with her at all. 

Maybe it could represent how young people dream big with no worries at the start. But, as they grow up they have these stages in life, represented by characters in the novel with different types of ignorance. Until 30 years comes by, where all truth is unveiled and the dream is deemed unattainable. 

The amount of ignorance in this book is obviously from the corruption of wealth, but is also somewhat from the natural being of humans. Ever since we read This is Water, it still makes me look at how people act according to selfishness. Everyone assumes everything for the benefit of themselves, like Tom assuming Gatsby killed Myrtle. He already hates Gatsby so it just gives him more of a reason(a better one too) to hate him. 

Assuming is inevitable, but all these characters jump to such great conclusions that end up being no where near true. To make up for that, there's also this enjoyment from the suffering of others, so pretty much being a sadist in the novel—near the end when basically everyone wants everyone else to go downhill so they can feel superior and powerful. 

Then there's Nick, who doesn't tell anyone what he actually knows, which is the truth. He listens to everyone, as they think they're right. I always wondered why he felt so pitiful for Gatsby but never released the truth. But, it's probably because everyone refuses to accept and recognize the truth because of this fake reality they've already generated. 

Blue Honey

"The late afternoon sky bloomed in the window for a moment like the blue honey of the Mediterranean..."(pg 34).

I honestly didn't know this was a thing. Apparently there was blue, brown, and green honey that came from bees feeding off junk food—M&M's (oddly enough). There was an actual case in Carolina that had that unnatural phenomenon, without M&M's, but that's still an unsolved mystery.

Anyways, honey actually represents things like prosperity and behavioral changes from what I've googled. We've already associated with things like yellow and gold to be dealing with money, which would be the same for honey, except that it's blue.

Blue represents things like trust and calmness. But blue honey...we've seen blue a few times. Like that Doctor's blue eyes and this one phrase that bugged me a lot, " his[Gatsby's] blue gardens." 

Blue gardens, blue eyes, and blue honey seem to me like these unrealistic fantasies that are hoped for. Blue generally represents calmness so being in that state of blue would bring stability and carefreeness. So, having blue associated with these things would mean stability in your surroundings, yourself, and your wealth, everything. 

Since this book is written from Nick's POV, I noticed this doubt that he sometimes has. With Gatsby,  he doesn't really know what to believe. At Gatsby's party, he has people telling him left and right that Gatsby either killed a guy or was a German spy. Then to further that confusion, Gatsby explains his adventurous past which is clearly hard to believe without definite proof. All of it just seems so far-fetched that these fantasies won't really ever be attainable, only seen through dreams.

Mine

"Macon was delighted. His son belonged to him now and not to Ruth..."

That ungrateful woman, that father is her life. This right here, this is mine. No longer does that woman own my son. Why need something that doesn't help you?

Finally. Someone worthy of the Dead name. Inheriting most of my traits, I knew he'd be the one. All this hard work, this money, I can live on knowing this family will continue to prosper. My son, the only one who gets me. As the heir of this family, he's doing the right thing. I'm only guiding him in the right direction. Everything I do now is for me and him. See! This is the key to life. Money, family, success.

He's the one following my steps, on the right path. I can do so much more without collecting those rents without running around the place looking like drug dealer. It makes me look better. So much more time, more money...I can visit the bank, auctions, and property to expand my business! There's so much more that could be mine. No one will ever look at me thinking I'm one of those poor "Negroes [who] wasn't going to get a big slice of the pie."


All I need to do is teach him more. I can never stoop lower than what I have. This line of Dead will continue with the money and power I've built all these years and will be recognized as one of the greatest. Everything will fill into my hands and become mine.